OVERCOMING OCD
Broken Promises
The easy thing to do would be to continue (or should I say suffer) with OCD or give in to compulsions and let my life be ruined ever so quickly.
You see, no one knows what OCD is like except the sufferer. And let, me tell you (and I typically don’t use this phrase), it is hell on earth.
The reason why it is hell on earth is because I believe that it is literally a demonic attack on our minds. I think some of us are assigned messengers of the devil to literally try to break us in times of our lives. Especially important times in our lives.
If you are suffering from OCD, let me first say, I’m sorry you have to go through this. I also know what it’s like, and words cannot describe the anxiety and physical components (like a headache or a sore throat) that plague OCD sufferers.
Paul also suffered, and he wrote: “Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’”
For some of us, this may be the thorn at our side. With that being said, speaking from personal experience, OCD can go away. *But, let me also warn you, it can come back!
Even just now, I was discouraged from writing this blog, but yet I’m determined to get this message across…
So back to what I was saying, OCD is absolutely miserable. I remember getting through it in the past, but this time around, I have felt completely helpless. I analyze everything I do and say and it’s hard to just live. I often think I am a terrible person and I take responsibility that may or may not be mine to take.
I remember this started about six months ago when I remember deliberately sinning in a certain area of my life. It seemed to spark an ongoing battle with terrible thoughts and worry which turned into terrible thoughts and urges to have compulsions. I have been in a battle ever since.
I wish I could tell you to just stop and ignore the thoughts, urges, lies, but I know it’s unfortunately not that easy. You are going through a battle with the enemy of your soul and he’s not going to stop at anything. If he can’t take your life, he’ll want to ruin yours in every way – from your job to the ones you hold close to you.
Just a couple weeks ago, I lost my job and I was demoted from my position. I was so nervous and exhausted I couldn’t think straight. My mind couldn’t focus on the present because it was as if I was living in two different worlds. My OCD world and the world God intended me to live in – a world I’m supposed to make a positive difference in.
Honesty is refreshing. Even now, just being honest with myself is opening the doors to relief in my mind. You see, you can’t hide your OCD forever. Eventually it becomes apparent to everyone around you, so you might as well accept it now and receive healing now.
You might need to tell someone you love, hey, I’m sorry I’m in a bad mood right now; I’m just really under a spiritual attack right now/OCD. That’s a lot better than what I’ve done in the past – trying to conceal.
Anyway, I think humility is a key component that OCD sufferers need to grasp. I know that when I humble myself and listen to the valuable advice of another strong Christian, my symptoms become a lot more manageable. Recognize there’s a problem (that’s the first step!) and then listen to another’s (A CHRISTIAN’S) help.
But online forums – well, I would advise avoiding those! Unfortunately, you have a lot of people with opinions that are not from a godly perspective or people that may not be able to relate or have the scientific background knowledge to provide sound advice.
If you are like me and you are suffering from religious OCD specifically, it seems like there is no remedy to help against this because when everything is twisted in your mind, it is hard to find comfort anywhere. People like us who suffer from severe religious OCD need to take a step back and not be so hard on ourselves.
For me, it has been about fears about making promises. You can tell me it’s okay as long as you don’t say the promise out loud or just as long as you don’t freely make the promise, but in my OCD mind, I’ll take full responsibility so nothing seems to bring me comfort.
But that’s why I want to relieve your fears and my fears about promises. You see, you can make the worst promise in the world and want to take it back – andddd…. You can! Well, let me be clearer, Jesus can. Jesus can forgive anything!! I know that’s hard to believe, especially when you look at verses about blaspheming (maybe I can save that topic for another blog), but seriously Jesus can forgive every intentional wrongdoing. All we have to do is ask!
Bible verse: "‘Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.’”
I’m sick of people trying to create stipulations – we are not living in the Old Testament era! Thanks be to Jesus Christ who died for our sins and makes atonement available to us! Yes, there is hell. And yes, there is right and wrong. But we are not perfect. Only Jesus is. Do you see now why God had to send His one and only Son? There was no other option!
If you are like me, and you take your thoughts and actions so seriously and you feel severely stressed about the future because it’s like a maze you can never quite figure out and you make mistake after mistake after mistake…let me tell you – there is hope for you! Thanks be to God, there is hope for me!
All these silly promises are broken in the light of Jesus’ shed blood on the cross. We are conquerors; we are forgiven. If you feel like you’ve deliberately made a promise even without OCD and you don’t want to follow through with it – don’t! You can ask for forgiveness right now and be cleansed from that sin and promise forever. In Jesus name.
Let me tell you, the pain in your head may still linger, but rest assured in the promises of God. Now, He is the one who can make a promise! We are humans; we mess up. God, on the other hand, He never changes. We can trust in His Word, His promises, because He knows what He is doing!
So, today, if you’ve made a promise and you are worried because you feel obligated to follow through with it even though you’re terrified of its ramifications, let me say now, in Jesus, you are free.
May the demons run and flee at the precious name of our Lord, Jesus Christ. May He use your OCD, your struggle, for His own glory. Take a minute to praise Him now and say Thank you Jesus for healing me. Not my will be done, but Yours Lord. Rest in His presence and focus on Him and not your problem. God is good, can I hear an “Amen?”
**I don’t claim to have all the answers. I can’t say that everything I type for this blog will be right, but I can say that I serve an awesome God who does have all the answers. If there’s something I said that didn’t sit well with you, take it to God. Let Him give you the guidance you need.
God bless dear brothers and sisters in Christ! 😊
~ Anonymous Believer